This Is Not What I Expected (2017)

-

Director: Derek Hui

Writers: Joyce Chan, Yuan Li, Yimeng Xu, from a novel by Lan Bai Se

Stars: Zhou Dongyu, Takeshi Kaneshiro, Yi-zhou Sun, Ming Xi, Kuo-Chu Chang, Yo Yang, Chi-Ling Lin, Xiaosong Gao, Yingjun Zhao, Tong Hai




A rich but emotionally cold cute CEO in charge of cute hotel acquisitions (Takeshi Kaneshiro) has numerous cute but unpleasant encounters with a daffy young cute woman (Zhou Dongyu), unaware that she is also the cute chef whose cute culinary artistry has conquered his cute cultivated palate cute cute cute.

 


Oh my God, this movie annoyed me.

 


I can imagine director Derek Hui showing up on set every day with a megaphone and an adorable poodle, shouting, “Aren’t we feeling cute today, people? Come on, we can be cuter than this!” 



Zhou can simper with the best of them.







Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The End of the Affair (1951)

-
Image
by Graham Greene Maurice Bendix, a writer in WWII London, becomes  obsessed with learning the reason a married woman, Sarah Miles, broke off her love affair with him.   She never explained, and he feels there must have been another man.   When he gets his hands on her diary, he will learn how profoundly Sarah's world changed on the day a bomb struck the building they were occupying, and his own world will be shaken as well.   This is the last of Graham Greene's overtly Catholic novels, and it is fascinating.   Graham Greene Although I found Sarah's abrupt conversion unconvincing (the same problem I had when I saw the film adaptation), I was quickly won over as the consequences played out.   Religious faith can place a burden on the faithful, and Greene often describes it as if it were some form of affliction.   Many Christians say that accepting God will improve one's life here on earth, but in Greene's world, believers often endure terrible suffering and loneliness
Read more

The Thing (1982)

-
Image
Director: John Carpenter Writers: Bill Lancaster, based on "Who Goes There?" by John W. Campbell, Jr. Stars:  Kurt Russell,  A. Wilford Brimley, David Clennon, Keith David, Richard Dysart, Charles Hallahan, Peter Maloney, Richard Masur The crew of an Antarctic research station (Kurt Russell,  A. Wilford Brimley, David Clennon, Keith David, Richard Dysart, Charles Hallahan, Peter Maloney, Richard Masur, Donald Moffat, Joel Polis, and Thomas G. Waites) finds itself in conflict with an alien life form that can change its shape in this classic horror film that was considered both an artistic and commercial failure at its time of release.   Once the creature’s abilities are understood, we are treated to an object lesson (more relevant now than ever) in the destructive effect of division and mistrust on efforts to deal with an existential threat.  This is John Carpenter’s best film.   In addition to building a tremendous atmosphere with a wonderful sense of setting, the constricted
Read more

The Man of Bronze (Doc Savage #1) (1933)

-
Image
by Kenneth Robeson AKA Lester Dent An attempt on the life of Doc Savage--genius, crime fighter,  supreme physical specimen--takes him and his crew of loyal specialists to South America, where they will uncover the secret that Doc's father has left in the care of the people of a lost civilization.   All criticisms of this book concerning clunky prose and mechanical construction are entirely beside the point.   No one should read a pulp adventure novel expecting anything more than a quick, fun read--and Lester Dent (writing as Kenneth Robeson) delivers one.   Lester Dent Pulp authors worked fast and trod a well-worn path traveled by hundreds of other writers telling thousands of similar stories.  However, only a small percentage is remembered today, and Dent surely deserves to be included among their number.   "The Man of Bronze" (French) "The Golden Pyramid" (Italian)
Read more